Shortly before our wedding on June 21, 1980, Kate found a lump in her right breast. We were planning a big wedding, and she just couldn't deal with it before our big day. When we returned from our honeymoon she discovered she was pregnant (the good news!) but a biopsy of the lump confirmed our worst fears - cancer.

We lived in Palo Alto, California, at the time, and she was working for a small PR company. They had a good health plan, and we had access to the experts at Stanford Hospital. Their recommendations were a lumpectomy, radiation and prophylactic chemotherapy, but the radiation and chemo were almost certain to cause grave harm to the fetus. They indicated that if she chose to keep the fetus, then they would have ethical issues in providing the recommended treatments which, if not performed, could endanger her life.

So we (she, really) made the choice to give up the baby.

A healthy Kate then went on the bear three children, nursed them all on one breast, and they are all out making their way in the world. Cancer got her in the end, which she attributed to growing up in a terribly polluted Detroit, but it's impossible to know for sure.

By giving up our first, three lovely babies were brought into the world, grew up and are with us today. They might never have lived at all without that essential health care for their mother.